CONFIDENCE… WELL, IT’S EASY FOR YOU TO SAY BUT I’M NOT SO SURE I HAVE IT!

In every walk of life we see those individuals who appear to have their heads held high and strut around like proud peacocks but even those majestic and seemingly confident people can have elements of doubt when it comes to doing something they’re not familiar with or, as the expression goes, when stepping out of their ‘comfort zone’.

Flipping it back to the positive, how do these people build this sense of balanced self-confidence? Well It’s not about waving a magic wand and creating a quick fix solution but with confidence comes confidence and it’s like the building of a home, spend some time to get the foundations right and then the house goes up quickly thereafter.

There are many ways that Coaching to Success can help and part of what we do is to encourage a set of 9 exercises as listed below.

1 – BREATHE:  When you are nervous, you should not talk, but breathe until you calm down. This also works in cases where one is preparing for a big event and is stressed out.

2- GET A NOTEBOOK: Record all the good things that you manage to do. Write down everything that you do well from your workplace or from home, you will start to gain a decent level of self-confidence. Whenever you feel down, open this notebook and start reading it. These are evidence based notes.

3- BODY LANGUAGE: The next time when you feel down, look at your posture. You are probably walking with a very bad posture. If so, change it right then: eyes forward, back straight, keep your head high.

4- SET GOALS: If you do not have goals in your life then you do not know where you are going. Set goals in every area of your life. Every area! Work, personal life, social life, health and fitness, and everything else that is important to you. Set goals that are very clear and have a certain deadline on them. Put numbers in all your goals because that is the best way your brain works.

5- EXPAND: One of the simplest confidence building exercises is to expand one’s knowledge area. Try to find the areas that you really need at work or at home and start becoming better at those because they will help you the most. The more you know the better you will feel. Just get out of your cosy comfort zone and build your confidence! It’s not hard to read a couple of pages from a coaching related book each day. With competence, comes confidence

6 – COMPLIMENT YOURSELF: Have you ever complimented yourself on a daily basis? If not, set about changing that. You don’t need to let someone else see you while you are doing this. Say things like: “I am truly amazing! Just to think of how fast I solved that problem!”, “Wow, Fred came to me to help him as he knew I could help and I did”

7 – EXERCISE AT WORK: If you have been in a working environment, you have surely started to notice the things that you seem to do better than others. Maybe others even told you that you have a special something about what you do at work. What can you do better than others and with no effort? There is surely at least one if not more things that you really shine at. Find these things, then, admit to yourself that you can do this better than others and commit to becoming even better on it. Congratulate yourself from time to time about your particular ability and cherish it.

8 – THE MINDSET: Get into a CAN DO mind set”.  Become a person that rarely says “No”, “I can’t do this”, “Have to”, “Should”, “Must”, “I’ll do it later”.  These words are toxic for your self-confidence. Slowly and very surely killing all the self-esteem and self-confidence you have. Use strong, motivating words like “I will do this”, “I am doing it”, “Sure”, “Yes”, “Of course I can do it”, “I can”.

9 – SELF-HYPNOSIS: At night, when you feel sleepy, lie in your bed and repeat this simple affirmations:

“I am a unique creation. I am special with every single cell in my body. I can do anything. Anything. Anything that I set my mind to do. There is no one and nothing that can stop me. If I truly want something I will achieve it. I will put all my strength in my actions and I will break any obstacle that may rise. I am a great person! I feel positive energy running through my entire body. I know now that I am confident in my abilities and in myself. I am amazing!”

These are intended to make you feel better about yourself and to start making you more aware of the extraordinary powers you have within your soul. Another positive affirmations for the morning, just so that you start you day in a positive way:

“This day will be wonderful for me! I will live one of the best days of my life today! Everything in the Universe will help me with every step that I make! I feel like a new man/women! I feel amazing! I am certain that this day will be one of those days that I will remember my entire existence! I feel self-confident and sure that I will do great things today! I am a person who does things! I am a winner!”

Make sure that you say this as soon as you wake up because that is one of the moments when we are most receptive.

Hopefully this will start you on your path towards confidence but if there is or are some areas that you feel you could still do with some additional support, Coaching to Success are here to help, just call Neil (07761 187238) to arrange a free consultation on how we can help. We’d also appreciate any feedback on these blogs as to whether you find them interesting, beneficial or otherwise (neil.nutburn@coachingtosuccess.co.uk). Many thanks.